Day 88 - 102

HOORAYYY !

Wednesday, Feb. 27, was my last chemo treatment. Andrea drove me to Hamilton and took a few pictures. The procedure passed uneventfully. I dozed off as usual and upon returning home, slept much of the rest of the day.

Thursday morning, I took advantage of a reasonable amount of energy to prepare things for supper and do a little minor cleaning. Typically my strength erodes as the day goes on and over the next few days.

There is a little evidence of some nerve damaged from the previous taxol treatment so I am praying that there will be no further side effects and that the current symptoms are temporary.

I am scheduled to see the surgeon next Wednesday, March 05. Dr. Gudelis, who will be my "follow-up" oncologist feels that the little bit of hardness left in my breast is probably scar tissue - dead cancer cells. Only pathology following surgery can confirm whether cancer sells still exist. Tentatively, surgery is scheduled for March 28. I will know more details after March 05. The Lord may intervene in the meantime!

Tedra and Jesse were down for the weekend. Jesse's niece, Kaylee, who was a flower girl with Mikaela, came as well. The girls had a great time together and were really good.

Sunday morning Tedra was able to start lunch for me and I was able to go with them to church. It certainly has been wonderful to experience more "good" days the past few weeks.

Over the last few days I have also had the opportunity to share with my family doctor, a salesperson and a nurse how the Lord has enabled me to keep focused on today - to live today unencumbered by the future. I can't describe the peace though. Only those who have experienced God's peace can possibly relate.

The wide range of support we have had in so many different ways has been SUCH a blesssing. It has certainly helped carry us through these long weeks.

Many have expressed that the blog has been encouraging to them. I hope you all realize that it is the Lord's strength in my weakness. So do be encouraged! His grace IS sufficient.

Day 81 - 87

THE WEEKEND

This past weekend (Feb. 9 - 10) was the best I have felt since before Christmas. I felt well enough to go to church on Sunday. It was the first time I have been able to go in 2 months. I have to admit, as I began to sing the first song of praise I teared up. What privileges we take for granted. I attended the 9:00 am service and went home and rested. After the 2nd service, Scott called me and asked if I felt up to going out for lunch. I did. Two treats in one day! Actually, I had three treats in one day. I ordered french fries instead of baked potatoes. We don't eat fries very often anyway, but this is the first time in over 4 months. The highlight of the day occured as we were returning to the van. As you may recall, Sunday was an extremely windy day. Scott helped me to the van and stepped ahead to open the door. As I reached for the door for support, a strong gust of wind removed my "hair" and scooted it across the parking lot. Luckily another van was parked about 3 spaces over and stopped the frollicking wig. Otherwise, we might still be trying to track it down. Unfortunately, no one had a video camera. It was a great moment for a good laugh.

TUESDAY, FEB. 12

We went to Hamilton for the usual bloodwork and check-up with the doctor. I met with Dr. Susan Gudelis this time. She assists Dr. Tozer. The chemo is continuing to be effective. From the other test results that have come back, everything seems to be okay. I suspect my body is just reacting to all the chemicals that it is being subjected to. It appears that on the whole, taxol may be a little easier on me than the other 2 chemo drugs.

I also had an appointment with the radiation oncologist. The medical team's plan is that after the last chemo treatment, I am given a few weeks to recover and then I am scheduled for surgery. I will see Dr. Liaconis, the surgeon, Mar. 05. After surgery and another few weeks to heal, radiation treatments would begin - five times a week for 5 weeks. The van will probably be able to find its own way to Hamilton by then.


WEDNESDAY, FEB.13

Andrea was able to take me to the Juravinski Centre for my 3rd taxol treatment.We were there for a little over 4 hours. Everything went well. I did develop the flush on my face and neck half way through the treatment, but it is probably a mild reaction to the steroid I have to take to prevent reaction to the taxol. This is the third time I have had the "flush" and it clears up in a couple of days with Benadryl. The worst part of that is the drowsiness from the Benadryl - nothing worth complaining about. Feb. 27 is scheduled to be the final chemo treatment.

It has been an "interesting" journey; one of the best parts has been exercising the discipline of resting in Him today. He provides the grace I need for today. He does not supply the grace I need for what I wonder about the future. That will come when it becomes today. You may have noticed that I state what the medical plan is. I do not take ownership of that plan because the plans for my future are in God's hands and ultimately, only He knows what tomorrow holds. What overwhelming peace and joy are ours when we train ourselves to rest in Him. Like physical exercise, refusing to mentally go down roads before we even come to the intersection takes time to develop, but as we make the choice and ask for His help to just trust Him, we become stronger. And like physical training, the exercise has to continue. I still have weak moments but am learning much more quickly to surrender to Him. If I am lacking peace, I am the one who robbed myself. Thank you again for your prayers. They carry me on my weak days.

DAY 71 -80

The days following the second treatment of taxol have not been as challenging as the first time. The side effects have been similar but easier to control. I do find that there is a "heavy" weariness that settles on me for the first week compared to the other chemo. As the day goes on, my knees feel like they have turned to rubber. Now, a week after treatment, my strength is improving again.

Last weekend (Feb. 2-3), Tedra and Jesse were down. It was good to spend time with them and Brynn - our grand-doggy. Tedra has just returned to work. She still has some queasiness, but the vomiting has stopped. She has just hit the 13 week mark, and though she has lost weight from the "morning sickness" (that lasted all day) she is sporting a firm round belly. The guess-timated due date is Aug.13.

Andrea and Mikaela have not been well so some of the extra sunshine has been missing this week. I appreciate their concern for my well-being though. Mikaela is feeling better now and is coming over to spend a little time with us this evening.

Mikaela is not only our delight but makes the day for Great Grandpa with her visits. He seems to be adjusting to life at the John Noble Home. Unfortunately, I am not able to make any visits right now. It certainly is good to have him so close now.

I want to express my heartfelt appreciation to many of you who have dropped off food over these past several weeks. You'll never know how often those meals felt like "life-savers" - many times arriving when we were all feeling like our energy was spent. I am amazed to still be receiving cards assuring me that I am still in people's thoughts and prayers and that people still check out the blog despite my inability to keep it as up to date as I would like. Wherever my family go, people ask how we are doing. We are so blessed to have not only the Lord as our strength but such wonderful people holding us up and cheering us on.