Day 88 - 102

HOORAYYY !

Wednesday, Feb. 27, was my last chemo treatment. Andrea drove me to Hamilton and took a few pictures. The procedure passed uneventfully. I dozed off as usual and upon returning home, slept much of the rest of the day.

Thursday morning, I took advantage of a reasonable amount of energy to prepare things for supper and do a little minor cleaning. Typically my strength erodes as the day goes on and over the next few days.

There is a little evidence of some nerve damaged from the previous taxol treatment so I am praying that there will be no further side effects and that the current symptoms are temporary.

I am scheduled to see the surgeon next Wednesday, March 05. Dr. Gudelis, who will be my "follow-up" oncologist feels that the little bit of hardness left in my breast is probably scar tissue - dead cancer cells. Only pathology following surgery can confirm whether cancer sells still exist. Tentatively, surgery is scheduled for March 28. I will know more details after March 05. The Lord may intervene in the meantime!

Tedra and Jesse were down for the weekend. Jesse's niece, Kaylee, who was a flower girl with Mikaela, came as well. The girls had a great time together and were really good.

Sunday morning Tedra was able to start lunch for me and I was able to go with them to church. It certainly has been wonderful to experience more "good" days the past few weeks.

Over the last few days I have also had the opportunity to share with my family doctor, a salesperson and a nurse how the Lord has enabled me to keep focused on today - to live today unencumbered by the future. I can't describe the peace though. Only those who have experienced God's peace can possibly relate.

The wide range of support we have had in so many different ways has been SUCH a blesssing. It has certainly helped carry us through these long weeks.

Many have expressed that the blog has been encouraging to them. I hope you all realize that it is the Lord's strength in my weakness. So do be encouraged! His grace IS sufficient.

Day 81 - 87

THE WEEKEND

This past weekend (Feb. 9 - 10) was the best I have felt since before Christmas. I felt well enough to go to church on Sunday. It was the first time I have been able to go in 2 months. I have to admit, as I began to sing the first song of praise I teared up. What privileges we take for granted. I attended the 9:00 am service and went home and rested. After the 2nd service, Scott called me and asked if I felt up to going out for lunch. I did. Two treats in one day! Actually, I had three treats in one day. I ordered french fries instead of baked potatoes. We don't eat fries very often anyway, but this is the first time in over 4 months. The highlight of the day occured as we were returning to the van. As you may recall, Sunday was an extremely windy day. Scott helped me to the van and stepped ahead to open the door. As I reached for the door for support, a strong gust of wind removed my "hair" and scooted it across the parking lot. Luckily another van was parked about 3 spaces over and stopped the frollicking wig. Otherwise, we might still be trying to track it down. Unfortunately, no one had a video camera. It was a great moment for a good laugh.

TUESDAY, FEB. 12

We went to Hamilton for the usual bloodwork and check-up with the doctor. I met with Dr. Susan Gudelis this time. She assists Dr. Tozer. The chemo is continuing to be effective. From the other test results that have come back, everything seems to be okay. I suspect my body is just reacting to all the chemicals that it is being subjected to. It appears that on the whole, taxol may be a little easier on me than the other 2 chemo drugs.

I also had an appointment with the radiation oncologist. The medical team's plan is that after the last chemo treatment, I am given a few weeks to recover and then I am scheduled for surgery. I will see Dr. Liaconis, the surgeon, Mar. 05. After surgery and another few weeks to heal, radiation treatments would begin - five times a week for 5 weeks. The van will probably be able to find its own way to Hamilton by then.


WEDNESDAY, FEB.13

Andrea was able to take me to the Juravinski Centre for my 3rd taxol treatment.We were there for a little over 4 hours. Everything went well. I did develop the flush on my face and neck half way through the treatment, but it is probably a mild reaction to the steroid I have to take to prevent reaction to the taxol. This is the third time I have had the "flush" and it clears up in a couple of days with Benadryl. The worst part of that is the drowsiness from the Benadryl - nothing worth complaining about. Feb. 27 is scheduled to be the final chemo treatment.

It has been an "interesting" journey; one of the best parts has been exercising the discipline of resting in Him today. He provides the grace I need for today. He does not supply the grace I need for what I wonder about the future. That will come when it becomes today. You may have noticed that I state what the medical plan is. I do not take ownership of that plan because the plans for my future are in God's hands and ultimately, only He knows what tomorrow holds. What overwhelming peace and joy are ours when we train ourselves to rest in Him. Like physical exercise, refusing to mentally go down roads before we even come to the intersection takes time to develop, but as we make the choice and ask for His help to just trust Him, we become stronger. And like physical training, the exercise has to continue. I still have weak moments but am learning much more quickly to surrender to Him. If I am lacking peace, I am the one who robbed myself. Thank you again for your prayers. They carry me on my weak days.

DAY 71 -80

The days following the second treatment of taxol have not been as challenging as the first time. The side effects have been similar but easier to control. I do find that there is a "heavy" weariness that settles on me for the first week compared to the other chemo. As the day goes on, my knees feel like they have turned to rubber. Now, a week after treatment, my strength is improving again.

Last weekend (Feb. 2-3), Tedra and Jesse were down. It was good to spend time with them and Brynn - our grand-doggy. Tedra has just returned to work. She still has some queasiness, but the vomiting has stopped. She has just hit the 13 week mark, and though she has lost weight from the "morning sickness" (that lasted all day) she is sporting a firm round belly. The guess-timated due date is Aug.13.

Andrea and Mikaela have not been well so some of the extra sunshine has been missing this week. I appreciate their concern for my well-being though. Mikaela is feeling better now and is coming over to spend a little time with us this evening.

Mikaela is not only our delight but makes the day for Great Grandpa with her visits. He seems to be adjusting to life at the John Noble Home. Unfortunately, I am not able to make any visits right now. It certainly is good to have him so close now.

I want to express my heartfelt appreciation to many of you who have dropped off food over these past several weeks. You'll never know how often those meals felt like "life-savers" - many times arriving when we were all feeling like our energy was spent. I am amazed to still be receiving cards assuring me that I am still in people's thoughts and prayers and that people still check out the blog despite my inability to keep it as up to date as I would like. Wherever my family go, people ask how we are doing. We are so blessed to have not only the Lord as our strength but such wonderful people holding us up and cheering us on.

Day 58 - 70

A QUICK OVERVIEW OF THE PAST 13 DAYS

The days since my first taxol injection have been interesting and unpredictable to say the least. Here are some of the "highlights":

• I developed a rosy flush on my face and neck. A couple of days on Benadryl (which meant a couple of days of sleeping) did the trick.
• One day was quite uncomfortable with lower back and hip pain
• After a couple of days of just not feeling well - nothing specific - my temperature rose quite high. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic.
• Heart palpitations and a pulse rate of 120 that lasted over 2 hours lead to a day in Brantford General ER. A number of tests were done but no conclusions made.
• Another spike in temperature while still on antibotics ended me back up in ER. Still no conclusions.

TUESDAY, JANUARY 29

I have just returned from my check-up at the Juravinski Cancer Centre. Dr. Tozer believes that the temperature issue is caused from what is going on in the digestive tract lining. It is my understanding that these cells, like the hair, are fast growing and are therefore affected by chemo. What is happening won't respond to antibiotics but will correct itself. No more antibiotics. YAY! Another set of bloodwork was ordered. My poor little arms have quite an array of needle pricks. Thankfully, I have good veins. The doctor is ordering a Holter Monitor to check out the heart activity.

On the whole, with the exception of times of fatigue and a few temperature spikes, I am feeling quite well.

I have great appreciation for Dr. Tozer and all of the staff at the cancer centre. They are very thorough. How much more I want to express my gratefulness to a wonderful God. He is watching over me 24/7. I have been meditating recently on these principles. God is good. God's plans are for good. Therefore, I KNOW these days are producing GOOD that will bring glory to Him!

Blessings to each of you. I can't begin to express how it feels to belong to such an amazing, though vast and varied, family.

Please be praying...

The last couple of weeks have been a struggle. For the 2nd time this week, mom is on her way up to the emergency department. She has a fever that continues to fluctuate as well as other various symptoms. We will try to update you soon. Please be praying...

Day 57 - Taxol treatment #1

Mom and Dad drove to Hamilton first thing this morning for her 1st Taxol treatment. She told me that during the drive she could feel the prayers of many and experienced such an "overwhelming sense of peace and joy".

Mom was given some medication and then had to wait 45min before they could begin the Taxol treatment. Those meds were to help prevent an allergic reaction. When they began chemo, the nurses gave Mom the call button in case she began to experience ANY reactions. Shortly after they started, the hospital chaplain walked through the area. Dad spoke to her, so she came over and began chatting with them. Dad had to leave to move the van, so the chaplain stayed to keep Mom company while he was gone. After she left, Mom realized that the time had passed for the possibility of a reaction and she had experienced none!! The Benadryl made Mom sleepy so she napped off and on while she continued receiving Taxol. The entire procedure from start to finish took about 5 hours. Once she was finished chemo, she had enough strength to walk to the van but then couldn't wait to have a nap when she got home!

Tonight Mom is doing well - physically, emotionally and spiritually. She continues to walk this journey step by step knowing that her loving Heavenly Father protects her in the palm of His hand and thankful for the "family" that daily hold her up in prayer. Once again - thank you to so many of you for your many prayers. Never underestimate how powerful they are...we can feel them!!

We are continuing to believe for complete healing in Mom's body. In the meantime, God continues to show us His love and faithfulness and is teaching us in the midst of the storm. Even when we don't understand His ways or at times question His purposes, He never leaves us and always carries us through - day to day to day...

So in the words of Mikaela while praying tonite...
"Thank you God for grandma...and that she knows you...and we know she loves you. Make her feel better - take away the cancer and her chemo and all the bad stuff in her. Help her hair grow back and heal her so she can be normal again."

AMEN, AMEN and AMEN!!!

Andrea

Catch Up Time...Day 56 - (Tues)

Guess it's about time I update the blog for mom and bring everyone up to speed. My apologies to so many of you who have been faithfully checking for updates...

This past week was a rough one. Mom had numerous struggles - her fever fluctuating up and down, vomiting, weakness, exhaustion - but as always, rarely a complaint.

Today mom, dad and I went to the Juravinski Clinic for the usual bi-weekly blood work and appointment with the oncologist. 2 weeks ago was mom's 4th and final treatment of AC (the 1st chemo cocktail). She is now halfway through her chemo treatments! At this point things appear to be progressing as expected so they will begin a new chemo drug tomorrow - Taxol. It will consist of 4 more treatments, given every other week. This means Feb 27th should be her last and final chemotherapy treatment!

With Taxol comes the possibility of new side effects. The doctors do not know how each person will react and so it's always an "unknown". However, we've been informed of the possibilities which may include an allergic reaction, musculoskeletal pain and sensory nerve damage which could cause permanent numbness/tingling in her hands and feet...not to mention a continued increase of weakness and fatigue. Because of the possibility of an allergic reaction, mom has to begin taking medication the day before chemo and continue it until the day after chemo. They will also give her additional medication the day of her treatment to help prevent a reaction. Tomorrow, being her first day to receive Taxol, they will keep a close eye on her to make sure she does not have a reaction. She has to be at the Juravinski clinic by 9:00AM and once the treatment begins, the process will be a minimum of 5 hours.

Please be praying that there will be no allergic reactions to Taxol and that the extreme side effects (ie pain and nerve damage) will not affect her in any way. Also pray for my dad while he tries to entertain himself at the clinic for 5 hours or more!! (any one who knows dad knows how easy that will be - haha) :-)

Once again, thank you for the wonderful support, prayers and many things so many of you have done for mom/dad and our family! We thank God for all of you and speak His MANY blessings over you and your families!

Andrea

Day 47 & 48

I decided to write an update for mom. She intended on writing a couple of blogs a week but has found it difficult to find the energy. So...you're stuck with me!! :-D

Mom had her 4th chemo treatment last Wednesday (January 2nd). Usually, the 4th day after her treatment is her most difficult day...this was the case yet again on Sunday.

Her stomach pain and exhaustion level has increased with each chemo treatment. Yesterday was probably the worst day of pain she has had so far. But as always, mom was a trooper, never wanting to impose on anyone... so I "forced" my help on her :-) By Sunday evening, the pain was easing off and tiredness was her biggest complaint.

This morning on my way to work, I stopped in to see how mom was feeling. She was being served breakfast made by my dad (he's quite the cook now) and said she was feeling much better.

After work, I came back to the house and helped dad finish off supper (good salad dad...if you don't say so yourself haha)! Mom mentioned that she had a few enjoyable visits today with family/friends, for which she was thankful. She was feeling a little chilled so she decided to take her temperature and found that it was elevated. The cancer clinic has advised her that because her immune system has been compromised by chemo, she must be sure to watch for any sign of a fever which could indicate a virus or infection that her body would be unable to fight off. They have told her to call them whenever she has a fever of 100.5F (38C). By later this evening, her temperature had not come down so she decided to call the Juravinski clinic to find out what she should do. They told her that if it goes any higher or she becomes any worse tonight, she is to call the Brantford General Hospital and head up there immediately. After dad had called me, to let me know, and was about to hang up, I could hear mom in the background saying..."Tell her I'm fine - I'll be ok..." :-)

Mom's faith and courage is such an example to all of us. Many of you have expressed to us how encouraging this blog has been...and yes, she really has been as strong as she sounds in her blogs!!

Mom - I am so proud of you. For always thinking of everyone else and never wanting to impose...for always finding that little extra bit of energy for a smile (especially for your granddaughter)...for always wanting to end things on a "positive note" even when you feel like crap...and most of all for being such an amazing example of unwaivering faith in God even when things don't make sense...

Love you...
Andrea xo

Day 40 and 41 (Dec. 30 & 31)

The weekend was busy and enjoyable. Several friends stopped by for short visits. Some, from out of town, took time, while in the area, to check in on us. As Sunday progressed, so did my energy. It was one of my best days in a while. The 30th was Scott's birthday. We ordered in Chinese food from China King. Mmmm. Whether it was special for him or not, it sure hit the spot for me - a little cheat from the normal diet. :)

Tonight is New Year's Eve. It will be a quiet one for me. 2007 was a very eventful year for us. Many paths were not of my own choosing, but God never failed in any circumstance to make me aware of His presence.

2008 is here. May it be filled with many blessings. . . Watch for them! Some of the best ones are disguised.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Humbled by His favour,
Joy

Day 31 - Day 39

Again, I apologize for a long gap in blogging. Chemo treatment #3 (Dec.19) resulted in several rough days, spent mostly on the sofa. It's hard as a wife and mother to know all the things that need to be done, especially at Christmas, and to be unable to contribute.

Tedra and Jesse came down Saturday afternoon (Dec. 22). We had a wonderful Christmas celebration with them on Sunday evening (Dec. 23) and enjoyed spending time together on Monday (Dec. 24). They headed home Christmas Eve.

Andrea assumed the position of Primary Chef and Hostess for 3 days of cooking. Everyone did what they could to help but she definitely carried the brunt of the load. She did an amazing job - thanks, Andrea, from all of us - REALLY!

Christmas Day, Scott and I spent a quiet morning together - a first for us. Andrea, Mikaela, Joel, Scott and I shared Christmas dinner (#2) with friends Paul and Brandon. Later, we played "The Price Is Right" (one of Scott's gifts) and ended the evening with Paul at the piano, leading us in a precious time of worship. How wonderful to draw near to the Prince of Peace.

As the week goes on, my strength is slowly increasing. Friday, Dec. 28, I returned to the Juravinski Clinic for a check-up. The cancer is continuing to shrink. Dr. Tozer has changed some medications to deal with the stomach pain I have experienced. He also sent me for lab work to check my hemoglobin. All is well.

I am very appreciative of the staff at Juravinski Clinic. They are a thorough, dedicated team. BUT my hope remains in the One who is able to do a complete healing, in a moment of time. He is my Great Expectation!

How do we express our gratitude for the overwhelming support that we have received - in ways great and small - but none insignificant. Thank you for sharing our journey and helping to carry our load. On some days, you may even be carrying it for me. Blessings to each of you!