Pre-surgery day?

Today mom went to the Juravinski centre to meet with Dr. Whelan, the radiation oncologist. After speaking with Dr. Liaconis, mom's surgeon, they concluded that surgery is NOT an option at this time. In just a few days, the tumor has grown back to the size it was prior to chemo. This is not a typical response after chemo. (Mom says that's because she's an exceptional woman - I have to agree!) Instead, they are hoping to begin radiation treatments next week.

Mom and dad had to stick around Juravinski for the afternoon for preparations for radiation. After numerous Cat scans, repositionings and X-marker spots she now possesses not ONE but FOUR new tatoos!!! (we always knew she had a little rebel in her!) She will be scheduled for an information class in the next few days and they hope to begin radiation treatments some time next week...yet to be determined. For now, all we know is that they expect the treatments to last 5 days a week for 5 weeks, possibly more. All of this is pure speculation as they do not know how she will respond to the treatments.

So for now, we rest assured that God is in control and only HE knows the future. Although this path may not have been one that we anticiptated, God will still use all of it for His glory. He has written the book with our life story. Every chapter, every paragraph, every sentence He wrote. It comes together creating beautiful poetry, pointing to the awesomeness of our Saviour!

DAY 111 - 128

Well - life continues to be interesting.

Though I feel quite well and am able to get out and about more, regaining my strength seems to lag behind. It doesn't take long for the knees to get wobbly. BUT it feels good to feel good and to be able to be more social.

The weekend prior to Easter, Scott and I went to Orillia and enjoyed a couple of days with Tedra and Jesse. Sunday, we had a wonderful dinner with Jesse's family (and one of Tedra's special desserts). We were able to attend church with them as well. We enjoyed the time at Hope Christian Community Church. It was nice to meet some of the people from there who have been praying for us.

Easter weekend, Tedra and Jesse were home. We had good family time, food and fun.

Life also continues to be unpredictable.

The weekend that we were at Tedra's, I developed a rash. A visit to the doctor the Thursday before Good Friday caused him some concern. However, surgery was scheduled in a few days so I was to keep an eye on it and advise him if there were any other concerns. Within a few days, the cancerous area appeared to have blossomed again, becoming hard, tender and quite large.

A visit to his office today (Wednesday) has resulted in a possible hold on surgery scheduled for Friday and a visit tomorrow to the Juravinski Centre.

The growth caught me by surprise, but it was no surprise to the One who holds the future in His hands - the One who knows the number of hairs missing from my head! :-) He remains my hope and my help.

I owe so many "thank yous" to many of you but please know that not one word or act of kindness has gone unnoticed or unappreciated. Each one has been a blessing and an encouragement to us.

We cherish your continued prayers as we wait to see what lies ahead. My prayer is that above all the Lord will be glorified. He is so good!

AN EVENING OF LOVE SONGS

In honour of Pastor Scott and Joy Bacon. Please join with friends and family on Saturday April 26th, 2008 to show your love, support and appreciation for a couple who have touched the lives of many!

For tickets and information, please contact one of the names listed on the poster above (click on image to enlarge).

Hope to see you there!
Friends and Family of Scott & Joy

Day 103 - Day 110

Well, it's been 10 days since my final chemo treatment and my strength and energy are slowly beginning to increase.

Yesterday, was my final Neupogen injection. We celebrated with a late lunch at "My Thai". Scott also took me shopping for shoes and some cards. It didn't take long for me to start feeling a little wobbly. It's amazing how much we take for granted the strength to do simple, everyday tasks.

This past Wednesday was my appointment with the surgeon, Dr. Liaconis. Surgery is scheduled for March 28. The next three weeks are to give opportunity to somewhat recuperate from the chemo - blood counts to rise, body regain strength.

I have to admit I'm cautiously anticipating the next couple of weeks - no chemo, no dexamethasone (steroid), no needles, no appointments in Hamilton.

I'm hoping I will soon be able to eat the foods I have had to avoid while on chemo. Don't know how long it takes for food to taste normal, but at least I can tolerate most foods.

I am also looking forward to seeing people more often though I have to admit, as much as I love talking, conversation is energy-draining. One of those things we take for granted when we're well!

Again I find I have to keep my focus on today. I have already caught myself with unrealistic expectations for tomorrow.

No amusing stories to tell on myself (yet, anyway). My wig has stayed in place and, Diane, you'll be happy to know I haven't had any more fries (yet! :-))

Well, our journey continues. Thanks for travelling with me.

Day 88 - 102

HOORAYYY !

Wednesday, Feb. 27, was my last chemo treatment. Andrea drove me to Hamilton and took a few pictures. The procedure passed uneventfully. I dozed off as usual and upon returning home, slept much of the rest of the day.

Thursday morning, I took advantage of a reasonable amount of energy to prepare things for supper and do a little minor cleaning. Typically my strength erodes as the day goes on and over the next few days.

There is a little evidence of some nerve damaged from the previous taxol treatment so I am praying that there will be no further side effects and that the current symptoms are temporary.

I am scheduled to see the surgeon next Wednesday, March 05. Dr. Gudelis, who will be my "follow-up" oncologist feels that the little bit of hardness left in my breast is probably scar tissue - dead cancer cells. Only pathology following surgery can confirm whether cancer sells still exist. Tentatively, surgery is scheduled for March 28. I will know more details after March 05. The Lord may intervene in the meantime!

Tedra and Jesse were down for the weekend. Jesse's niece, Kaylee, who was a flower girl with Mikaela, came as well. The girls had a great time together and were really good.

Sunday morning Tedra was able to start lunch for me and I was able to go with them to church. It certainly has been wonderful to experience more "good" days the past few weeks.

Over the last few days I have also had the opportunity to share with my family doctor, a salesperson and a nurse how the Lord has enabled me to keep focused on today - to live today unencumbered by the future. I can't describe the peace though. Only those who have experienced God's peace can possibly relate.

The wide range of support we have had in so many different ways has been SUCH a blesssing. It has certainly helped carry us through these long weeks.

Many have expressed that the blog has been encouraging to them. I hope you all realize that it is the Lord's strength in my weakness. So do be encouraged! His grace IS sufficient.

Day 81 - 87

THE WEEKEND

This past weekend (Feb. 9 - 10) was the best I have felt since before Christmas. I felt well enough to go to church on Sunday. It was the first time I have been able to go in 2 months. I have to admit, as I began to sing the first song of praise I teared up. What privileges we take for granted. I attended the 9:00 am service and went home and rested. After the 2nd service, Scott called me and asked if I felt up to going out for lunch. I did. Two treats in one day! Actually, I had three treats in one day. I ordered french fries instead of baked potatoes. We don't eat fries very often anyway, but this is the first time in over 4 months. The highlight of the day occured as we were returning to the van. As you may recall, Sunday was an extremely windy day. Scott helped me to the van and stepped ahead to open the door. As I reached for the door for support, a strong gust of wind removed my "hair" and scooted it across the parking lot. Luckily another van was parked about 3 spaces over and stopped the frollicking wig. Otherwise, we might still be trying to track it down. Unfortunately, no one had a video camera. It was a great moment for a good laugh.

TUESDAY, FEB. 12

We went to Hamilton for the usual bloodwork and check-up with the doctor. I met with Dr. Susan Gudelis this time. She assists Dr. Tozer. The chemo is continuing to be effective. From the other test results that have come back, everything seems to be okay. I suspect my body is just reacting to all the chemicals that it is being subjected to. It appears that on the whole, taxol may be a little easier on me than the other 2 chemo drugs.

I also had an appointment with the radiation oncologist. The medical team's plan is that after the last chemo treatment, I am given a few weeks to recover and then I am scheduled for surgery. I will see Dr. Liaconis, the surgeon, Mar. 05. After surgery and another few weeks to heal, radiation treatments would begin - five times a week for 5 weeks. The van will probably be able to find its own way to Hamilton by then.


WEDNESDAY, FEB.13

Andrea was able to take me to the Juravinski Centre for my 3rd taxol treatment.We were there for a little over 4 hours. Everything went well. I did develop the flush on my face and neck half way through the treatment, but it is probably a mild reaction to the steroid I have to take to prevent reaction to the taxol. This is the third time I have had the "flush" and it clears up in a couple of days with Benadryl. The worst part of that is the drowsiness from the Benadryl - nothing worth complaining about. Feb. 27 is scheduled to be the final chemo treatment.

It has been an "interesting" journey; one of the best parts has been exercising the discipline of resting in Him today. He provides the grace I need for today. He does not supply the grace I need for what I wonder about the future. That will come when it becomes today. You may have noticed that I state what the medical plan is. I do not take ownership of that plan because the plans for my future are in God's hands and ultimately, only He knows what tomorrow holds. What overwhelming peace and joy are ours when we train ourselves to rest in Him. Like physical exercise, refusing to mentally go down roads before we even come to the intersection takes time to develop, but as we make the choice and ask for His help to just trust Him, we become stronger. And like physical training, the exercise has to continue. I still have weak moments but am learning much more quickly to surrender to Him. If I am lacking peace, I am the one who robbed myself. Thank you again for your prayers. They carry me on my weak days.

DAY 71 -80

The days following the second treatment of taxol have not been as challenging as the first time. The side effects have been similar but easier to control. I do find that there is a "heavy" weariness that settles on me for the first week compared to the other chemo. As the day goes on, my knees feel like they have turned to rubber. Now, a week after treatment, my strength is improving again.

Last weekend (Feb. 2-3), Tedra and Jesse were down. It was good to spend time with them and Brynn - our grand-doggy. Tedra has just returned to work. She still has some queasiness, but the vomiting has stopped. She has just hit the 13 week mark, and though she has lost weight from the "morning sickness" (that lasted all day) she is sporting a firm round belly. The guess-timated due date is Aug.13.

Andrea and Mikaela have not been well so some of the extra sunshine has been missing this week. I appreciate their concern for my well-being though. Mikaela is feeling better now and is coming over to spend a little time with us this evening.

Mikaela is not only our delight but makes the day for Great Grandpa with her visits. He seems to be adjusting to life at the John Noble Home. Unfortunately, I am not able to make any visits right now. It certainly is good to have him so close now.

I want to express my heartfelt appreciation to many of you who have dropped off food over these past several weeks. You'll never know how often those meals felt like "life-savers" - many times arriving when we were all feeling like our energy was spent. I am amazed to still be receiving cards assuring me that I am still in people's thoughts and prayers and that people still check out the blog despite my inability to keep it as up to date as I would like. Wherever my family go, people ask how we are doing. We are so blessed to have not only the Lord as our strength but such wonderful people holding us up and cheering us on.

Day 58 - 70

A QUICK OVERVIEW OF THE PAST 13 DAYS

The days since my first taxol injection have been interesting and unpredictable to say the least. Here are some of the "highlights":

• I developed a rosy flush on my face and neck. A couple of days on Benadryl (which meant a couple of days of sleeping) did the trick.
• One day was quite uncomfortable with lower back and hip pain
• After a couple of days of just not feeling well - nothing specific - my temperature rose quite high. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic.
• Heart palpitations and a pulse rate of 120 that lasted over 2 hours lead to a day in Brantford General ER. A number of tests were done but no conclusions made.
• Another spike in temperature while still on antibotics ended me back up in ER. Still no conclusions.

TUESDAY, JANUARY 29

I have just returned from my check-up at the Juravinski Cancer Centre. Dr. Tozer believes that the temperature issue is caused from what is going on in the digestive tract lining. It is my understanding that these cells, like the hair, are fast growing and are therefore affected by chemo. What is happening won't respond to antibiotics but will correct itself. No more antibiotics. YAY! Another set of bloodwork was ordered. My poor little arms have quite an array of needle pricks. Thankfully, I have good veins. The doctor is ordering a Holter Monitor to check out the heart activity.

On the whole, with the exception of times of fatigue and a few temperature spikes, I am feeling quite well.

I have great appreciation for Dr. Tozer and all of the staff at the cancer centre. They are very thorough. How much more I want to express my gratefulness to a wonderful God. He is watching over me 24/7. I have been meditating recently on these principles. God is good. God's plans are for good. Therefore, I KNOW these days are producing GOOD that will bring glory to Him!

Blessings to each of you. I can't begin to express how it feels to belong to such an amazing, though vast and varied, family.

Please be praying...

The last couple of weeks have been a struggle. For the 2nd time this week, mom is on her way up to the emergency department. She has a fever that continues to fluctuate as well as other various symptoms. We will try to update you soon. Please be praying...

Day 57 - Taxol treatment #1

Mom and Dad drove to Hamilton first thing this morning for her 1st Taxol treatment. She told me that during the drive she could feel the prayers of many and experienced such an "overwhelming sense of peace and joy".

Mom was given some medication and then had to wait 45min before they could begin the Taxol treatment. Those meds were to help prevent an allergic reaction. When they began chemo, the nurses gave Mom the call button in case she began to experience ANY reactions. Shortly after they started, the hospital chaplain walked through the area. Dad spoke to her, so she came over and began chatting with them. Dad had to leave to move the van, so the chaplain stayed to keep Mom company while he was gone. After she left, Mom realized that the time had passed for the possibility of a reaction and she had experienced none!! The Benadryl made Mom sleepy so she napped off and on while she continued receiving Taxol. The entire procedure from start to finish took about 5 hours. Once she was finished chemo, she had enough strength to walk to the van but then couldn't wait to have a nap when she got home!

Tonight Mom is doing well - physically, emotionally and spiritually. She continues to walk this journey step by step knowing that her loving Heavenly Father protects her in the palm of His hand and thankful for the "family" that daily hold her up in prayer. Once again - thank you to so many of you for your many prayers. Never underestimate how powerful they are...we can feel them!!

We are continuing to believe for complete healing in Mom's body. In the meantime, God continues to show us His love and faithfulness and is teaching us in the midst of the storm. Even when we don't understand His ways or at times question His purposes, He never leaves us and always carries us through - day to day to day...

So in the words of Mikaela while praying tonite...
"Thank you God for grandma...and that she knows you...and we know she loves you. Make her feel better - take away the cancer and her chemo and all the bad stuff in her. Help her hair grow back and heal her so she can be normal again."

AMEN, AMEN and AMEN!!!

Andrea